As Yoda promised you!

I'm back from vacation and i have never felt so good in a long time. I was down in Czech Republic to meet some friend and connect with some new. And we did party all night long with all the free beer I could drink. 
But enough about me.


When I was on was on vacation Yoda promised you that if you sent me Funny jokes, pics or videos I would post them. And  a man called Gold sent me this picture.

Keep your arms crossed. I promise that nobody will notice it.
//Darth Vader and GOLD

ModnaRX Is on vacation

ModnaRX Is on vacation. He will be back the 15th of september.
Until then lets give him a suprise if you have any funny picture, videos of know any good jokes. Don't hesitate to send it to his mail "ModnaRX@live.se" and i'm sure he will upload it. If you want you can tell your name/Nickname or what ever you would like to be called and he will sign it with your signature.  
See ya the 15th of september
//Yoda

Fashion or Bankrobber?

Is it just me who wants to try this?
//Darth Vader

Handy?

//Darth Vader

You shall not... 2.0

//Darth Vader

Even Voldermort.

//Darth Vader

Voldermort vs Harry Potter

//Darth Vader and Voldermort

4 sons

These 4 gents go out to play golf one sunny morning. One is detained in the clubhouse, and the other three are discussing their children while walking to the first tee.
"My son Kent," says one, "has made quite a name for himself in the home-building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful in fact, in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift."

The second man, no to be out done, tells how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "Norm's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave his friend two brand new cars as a gift."

The third man's son, Greg, has worked his way up through a stock brokerage, and in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift.

As the fourth man arrives at the tee, another tells him that they have been discussing their progeny and asks what line his son is in.

"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased with how my son turned out," he replies. "For 15 years, Chico's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's gay. However, on the bright side, he must be good at what he does because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two cars, and a big pile of stock certificates."
//Darth Vader

Divorced

//Darth Vader

So true!

//Darth Vader

That's just evil!

//Darth Vader

Um...

Poker Face

//Darth Vader

Many drinks

John had been sitting in a bar and taken a couple of drinks and felt it was time to go home. It proved more difficult than he thought, for time and time again he tumbled to the ground.


- Ok then I'll just lie here for awhile, 'said John to himself, thinking that it will be better soon..


After half an hour he tried again, but his legs did not carry him, so he crawled out into the street. Perhaps the fresh air to make sure he sobered up a bit. But no! Then he tumbled again.


- Oh eh god damn, well then I’ll crawl home, thought John.


Back home, he made another valiant attempt to get up, but he pulled straight up on the hall carpet.


So it was to crawl into bed. Luckily his wife was asleep and did not notice anything.


The day after she asked:


- Were there many Drinks at the pub yesterday?


- Oh no! I ate only one meal and had a beer, said John. How so?


- They called from the pub, wondering when you plan to pick up your wheelchair ...
//Darth Vader

$200 Bucks It Is...

A guy goes over to his friend's house, rings the bell, and the wife answers.

" Hi, is Tony home?"
" No, he went to the store."
"Well, you mind if I wait?"
" No, come in."
They sit down and the friend says "You know Nora, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I'd give you a hundred bucks if I could just see one."
Nora thinks about this for a second and figures what the hell - a hundred bucks. She opens her robe and shows one. He promptly thanks her and throws a hundred bucks on the table.
They sit there a while longer and Chris says "They are so beautiful I've got to see the both of them. I'll give you another hundred bucks if I could just see the both of them together."
Nora thinks about this and thinks what the hell, opens her robe, and gives Chris a nice long look. Chris thanks her, throws another hundred bucks on the table, and then says he can't wait any longer and leaves.
A while later Tony arrives home and his wife says "You know, your weird friend Chris came over. "
Tony thinks about this for a second and says "Well did he drop off the 200 bucks he owes me?"
//Darth Vader

the In†erne† bible

//Darth Vader

Did someone say rabbit?

//Darth Vader

Myth/Reality

Jesus Christ!

Skyrim

I guess that you have all seen this one.
And if you havn't... Do it!

//Darth Vader

I GOT YOUR MAMA!

Little Johnny came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was next week and he thought it was a good opportunity to talk about what he wanted.

- Mom, I want a bike for my birthday. 

Little Johnny was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at home and at school. The mother asked if Jonny thought he deserved some presents. Of course Jonny said. Jonny's mother, who was a Christian woman, wanted him to revise his behavior over the last year and then write a letter to Jesus and explain why he thought he deserved a bike. Jonny ran up the stairs to her room and sat down to write Jesus a letter. 

"Dear Jesus, 

I have been a very good boy this year and would like a red bike for my birthday. Your friend Jonny" 

Jonny knew that he wasn’t honest, he had not been a very good boy this year. So he tore up the letter and started again.

"Dear Jesus, 

This is your friend Jonny. 

I've been pretty good this year and would like a red bike for my birthday. Thanks in advance Jonny."

Jonny knew he still was not honest so he tore up the letter and started over again: 

"Dear Jesus, 

I've been a pretty good boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday. Your friend Jonny"

Jonny knew he could not send this letter to Jesus either. Jonny was very upset. He went back downstairs and told his mother that he would go to church. Johnny's mother thought her plan had worked because Johnny looked very sad. 

- Come home before dinner only, said the mother. 

Jonny walked down the street to the church and he went to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there who could see him. He picked up a statue of Holy Mary, let it quickly slide down his shirt and ran then out of the church. He ran all the way home and well at home so he ran immediately to his room where he wrote another letter to Jesus. 

"I GOT YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN SO GIVE ME THAT GOD DAMN BIKE! 

HELLO ... YOU KNOW WHO! "

//Darth Vader

Atheist

//Darth Vader

Blonde paint job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
//Darth Vader

Crazy Asian people!

Laughing my ass off!

I'm really the only one who loves these Asians? They really know how to make you laugh!

No, but seriously keep on dancing. Love it!

//Darth Vader

Learn Chinese in 5 Minutes

//Darth Vader

Existence of God? Existence of toothbrushes?

//Darth Vader

Who Wants to be a Millionaire!

A man and a woman was lying in bed and watched Who Wants to be a Millionaire?.
The man then said to the woman: Shall we have sex?
The woman replied: No.
Man: Is that your final answer?
Woman: Yes.
Man: Then I call a friend.

//Darth Vader

Sex!

Before sex, you help eachother get naked, after sex you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you're fucked
//Darth Vader

Funny Stuff!

So from now on i'm going to try to upload funny pictures, storys and videos atleast 1 new thing every day!
All for your entertainment!

//Darth Vader

I'm back!

Heya sorry i haven't uploaded any new stuff.lately.

So here's some new shit!

//Darth Vader

Random!

A bit of a funny video or what do you think?
//Darth Vader

April April!

- Can you please state how old you are? said defense lawyer.

- I am 86 years old, said the little lady.
- Tell me now, in your own words what happened the evening of 1 April 2009.
- Yes, I was sitting there on the porch, the lady said, when my young neighbor came and sat next to me. He told me that he liked older women and that I was very sexy. He started to rub my thigh.
- Did you stop him? asked defense lawyer.
- No, I did not, "said the little lady.
- Why not?
- It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died 30 years ago.
- And then?
- He started fondling my breasts.
- Did you stop him?
- No, I did not.
- Why not?
- His rubbing made me feel all warm all over, I have not felt this good in years.
- What happened then? asked defense lawyer.
- I felt so excited that I just put myself down and said:
- Take me, young man, take me!
- Well, he took you?
- Hell, no! He just yelled, "April, April!" And that's when I shot that bastard.

//Darth Vader